This world runs on very few philosophies out of which this is the most important one

"Can you take out few moment?
I am going to make your wish true.
Can you seek out your hiding and see the moon?
Can you unwind? and, I promise to die,
Before you see the dark side of moon.
I am going to always be there for you,
And hold your hands and that's true.
But the day you ask me to bend,
Sure I'll,
But that will be the end."

DID I EVER TELL?

Did I ever tell?
I fell for silent smile,
The glow on face,
And, the radiant sparks!
The curious you,
With uncertainty reign;
With confusions,
I fell for you.

Did I ever tell?
I will wait to eternity,
To hear you say,
All unspoken words!
The sweet you,
With periodic pinch;
With love or in pain,
I will wait for you.

Did I ever tell?
I started loving you,
To cherish the feel,
That spreads your very being!
The innocent you,
With pure heart;
With dreams,
How Can I not love you?

Wanted to write about something, but words fell short and crypt ended decrypted and I ended up writing something incomplete. I don’t know why I can’t put some things into words. The more I try, the more I fail or probably I have learnt how to control my thoughts, dreams and emotions.......whatever!

I AM LOVE

I asked happiness,
Will you be with me?
Replied! Didn’t even see.
I asked sadness,
Will you be with me?
Replied! Have time none for thee.
I asked richness,
Will you be with me?
Replied! Gold’s already with me.
I asked brain,
Will you be with me?
Replied! Relations broken between you & me.

None gave a ride,
And I walked alone.

I met hope,
Said! Walk on,
Destiny’s near sea.
I met patience,
Said! Let’s wait,
Lights coming from thee.
I met optimism,
Said! Don’t worry,
Success waiting for 'we'.
I met dream,
Said! Close your eyes,
See you have got all you wish.

Gave me courage,
And I walked with.

Time embarked,
Asked! Do you know 'recognize'?
I said no, it’s not on my fleet.
Told! On your way,
Partner of yours waited,
Gleamed! You sailed off,
Looking at blank sea.
Murmured! Why did not you had,
Recognize on with beats?
I sailed back,
With time on navigators seat,
To defeat my brains ply.

Everyone was on crew,
And I sailed again,
With all that left,
Immaterial, dumped in coal sink.
Yeah! I am love,
Walking alone, singing songs,
Delighted, my journey was free

I was going through the article “The Thing Called Love” which appeared in February 2006 Issue of “National Geographic” and in the course, in a break wrote this rough draft, which probably, never will make to final draft.

Written on: - March 6, 2006 02:49PM

ANGEL

With deep thoughts,
I closed my eyes,
To look for an angel,
And you were in front,
Smiling, laughing,
Shying, defying,
With closed eyes,
Hurting, disturbing,
Killing, mutilating,
And running away,
Out of the boundaries,
Trying to touch, stars!
And still you seemed,
Soothing my eyes.

With the brightest hopes,
I waited for long,
To hold your hands,
And you came with,
Flowers, love,
Heart, cupid,
Clasped in your hands,
None empty, filled,
Love splashed, artistic,
And trying the best,
But with none free,
That, I could hold your hands!
And still you seemed,
Holding my hands.

With all optimism,
I bashed too hard,
To make you smile,
And you smiled,
Shining, twinkling,
Gleaming, sparkling,
Sprinkling scent all around,
Watering, reddening,
Contradicting, reverting,
And hiding away,
Trying to seek you,
Your smile said it all!
And still you seemed,
Smiling! On a joyous ride.

With all my strength,
I walked the way,
To understand you,
To share, moments,
And, fun with all time.
Yeah! I understood,
The very of you,
The tied behind you,
But on the way,
Looking around,
I find myself lost,
But still holding,
The yack,
I know I’ll carry on.

I realized today sometimes trying being good to others just don’t does away the thing, sometimes the good can also turn into disappointment.Written On:- Jan 3, 2005 04:09 AM

UNKNOWN FEELINGS

Times passing, myself rained,
Hands in hand, my eyes are closed,
My heart is bursting,
Tears are scorched,
And, the smoke is life.

Intense thoughts of intrigue in me,
Mentally prepared, to be poached,
Long may be separations,
But I hope,
She to be home.

Insecurity howling me,
And brick is foam,
My own hounds me,
A troublesome bay,
Is created by thee.

Tears in eyes, I hope to be,
One day at top,
Though many times,
Haft I lost,
But it doesn’t kill my in.

Still burning a hope inside me,
I know I’ll have it,
However tough may be goal,
In her attribes and causal,
Will drive me to ace.

Good are my thoughts,
May be in my eyes,
I have to do,
Love should not turn off,
And may not the separations be long.

UNABLE TO SAY

Lips always shut,
she stares at me,
Speaks with me,
but never speaks.
I want to hear something,
That she knows, I think,
But lips always shut,
She answers me,
Never ever talks with me,
God knows what she thinks of me.
Talks of nation,
Talks of future,
Are not common in between,
Not of betray sign’s something.
I would have spoken,
But I dare not to speak,
Can’t even guess what would she say,
Yes or No whatsoever it is,
I would never speak,
I fear of quite NO that she would speak.
Books in hand,
when she comes to me,
God knows studies,
or me that scared of she.
Analyzing power proves no true,
What she wants of me,
Monotonous if I’m becoming,
She doesn’t speaks,
Boring if I should change,
I can’t guess what she thinks of me.
God please be with,
Tell me soon what she thinks,
Please create a large room,
in her for me.

THE ETERNAL SHE

The beckoning cry,
Mutilated and betrayed of mine,
Urged sinters she,
With love, I appeared,
Though arrogant and bright,
Brooded she,
Physical spices and cries,
Were all meek,
She spoke to me,
Allured and adored I woke,
Petals of thinking mine,
Sal carries the bird of our name,
Souls are now free of flaws,
But there’s a nail that pinch,
Bevy today and baffle the world,
There’s none in the world to betray,
Bars are not the light of sight,
Come to me I asked her,
Feeble she gave a fragile look,
Their was a notch deep in heart,
That made me despair,
Really the love of life is she,
She has become the only I see,
I do not who she started living inside me.

Do not try figuring any meaning out of these words ‘cause I myself do not know what they mean, while typing it I found it one of the worst of my creations.

love song

With whom I am going to sing this song,
With whom I am going to share my love,
With whom?

Who will be there to make me desperate,
Who will be there to fill her eyes for me,
Who will be there to shower her love on me,
Who will be there to share herself with me.

With whom I am going to fall in love,
With whom I am going to unite my soul,
With whom?

I am locked up with my words in mouth,
There’s something I want to say,
I do have to tell someone,
How much I find myself lost in her love,
In the search of love,
In the search of words to say.

Lost up in hopes and lost in this world,
I find myself standing alone,
With whom?

Love birds are singing,
And love songs are going on,
And I am standing in these,
Waiting for someone to love.

With whom I am going to explore this world,
With whom I am going to have romance,
With whom?

Tides are going to lick the moon,
And, I am seeing these,
To find myself lost in love,
With whom?

Someone find a way to,
Mend my broken heart,
My heart will go singing to find my love,
With whom?

fighting myself

>>iam my worst enemy & i love winning over myself

I am worst enemy of myself and I love winning over myself. Well this section describes my different encounters with my inner self when I was caught in between low and high phases of life. Well, there are many types of fights rather wars that I have fought with myself and have won but few are existing which I fail even to dare. And, there are few which I always think to escape.

>>JUST GIVE ME SATISFACTION

I have transmogrified, is it true? If true what has led it too, ‘am I heading towards something that's not me or I am going towards my destiny? An evolutionary end, a dead end! Was I better before or I am better now? Are some questions which haul and scares me now and then. But my age guides me that I am right, though an obsolete person whom I myself don’t know, and ‘am not able to understand. May be the blame goes to my age, my aura but I am entangled in my own web circumnavigating in my own mind. Gosh! The way I flushed is becoming difficult. I want to be back in that state so I have bashed my stact and the thing I extol, again,

Lackadaisical, wishy-washy and phlegmatic,
Are the words I betray?
I keep away from,
Jamboree or mutilation,
All are same.
How I act is simply odd,
But it’s the nature,
I’ve made,
My antiquity is different,
And my present,
Is Judas to my mind,
None is there that manumits,
My soul,
Kamikaze was the solution I thought,
I am tough to fight,
So, that failed too,
I am pacified with some talks,
That’s rare with my own,
I would call relations,
But one I was once angry upon,
Has made me relief,
My aim was different but I am,
Fighting for other,
For original no power is left,
I pray if there’s some guide, some divine,
Make me clear in mind,
And guide to something,
You like,
Just give me satisfaction.

>>MADE OUT OF WOODS

Made out of wood,
That smoke went on,
Burnt and burnt me,
With the full throttle,
That it itself,
Has never ever thought.

Lost in drinks,
I played my games,
I don’t know why?
I analyzed,
Someone I always avoided off!

The smoke that I have accepted,
Just cause she liked that,
Poked in myself,
In a way I never ever thought,
Sitting with the thoughts,
I just got myself out in one.

Seeing this world,
I don’t know why?
I care bout some,
That again I have never ever thought,
I don’t know again,
If I am mad,
Or mad is the world,
But the motive behind everything,
Appears the same.

What happiness?
And what pain?
Is in life,
When life itself,
Is still lost in smoke!
How one finds out someone,
Among these woods,
To share the truths,
Lie itself!

I saw the smoke,
And saw the water,
All appeared to me same!
Running away of my name,
I don’t know where,
I am going to find,
Some very same.
Got the choice,
But it was too far,
I don’t know again,
If am myself a fool,
Else how come are they so cool?

But still there’s one thing,
I always know,
I will wait n wait,
And it’s a promise,
Not to anyone but my own,
My wait will come out to be some time very true.

>>MANUMIT MY SOUL

Intent ’am I,
In my own renegade,
Which once swaggered & vaunted,
Of itself toughness,
Is lying in a manner,
That’s cavernous,
I think if I can,
Transform the world,
I think if I can,
Create some space,
Where the psychic,
Of mine can mitigate.
I can’t brandish,
Someone I abhor,
How can I make,
My lips to a leer,
To clear away the bog,
And to ply the reek away,
Saying of life is unburnished,
All the blames,
Somehow comes in my plunge,
Whatsoever makes me to do it?
Has not been opened,
But the bottle of mine is piped down.
When I was juvenile,
Or even not yenning,
The days I remember,
I was woebegone,
Blamed of all,
Wooed of my lei,
Said things now and then,
Then why they pass manacle,
When I repeat the same,
Why they treat as I’m a menhir,
Oh! God help me out,
&, manumit my soul. Please!

This was the poem I wrote while recalling some bad painful moment of my past

hidden truth

>>every peeled scale shows a new picture

The most wonderful that I have seen about life is what appears to be true most of the time, is not true, there's always an hidden side of it. Since, life is governed by so many parameters that the logics fail and so does the truth. the only way to escape is to just let it be the way it is without trying to analyze it or to explain it with owns logic, whenever reasoning comes about life, one is lost, lost in the endless ride of pains and false maturity.

14 years of love

Shying the moon,
Defying the riles,
Carved out of beauty,
She’s 9 year gold.
Reading literature,
And understanding life,
Defining actions,
She grew 11 years old.
Read some crypts,
And, decrypted many,
To know hidden truth.
Time passed blossoming,
And feminine feelings hardened,
Understanding the crypter,
She grew 14 years and bold.
Hurt by baby feels,
Entangled in crypts,
She didn’t even knew,
When the crypter became her lure.

Crypter was 30,
Stuck with society,
Fastened with own, rules,
Never loved “14 years” old.
To lure away her lure,
Bad words to actions,
Explanations to satisfaction,
Tried his best,
All, to increase the lure.
Caught in dilemma, asked her,
“If really did she love,
Not to see him anymore,
Or, his body,
Will be lying, dead on floor.”
With silent wet eyes,
Wearing the biggest smile,
She left, with word “DEAD”,
But she couldn’t,
Live without him anymore.

Yes! She left; her snap,
And a note,
“Love needs no reason,
If reasons, it’s not love anymore.
Bounded not by fences,
It’s pure as a WHORE.
It’s firm as noon,
And deep as the moon,
Holds no logic,
It defies all rules.
It leaves the seed,
To grow after all boon,
Without any mean and meanings,
Even one-sided love,
Molding ‘others’ every action,
In dreams & imaginations,
Into love,
And grows more and more;
Without seeing pain,
That comes very soon.”
Without finding right words,
To tell, her love,
In despair,
She died very soon.

Currencies and gold,
Responsible old man;
Gave all to his,
Life’s pleasing; half own,
Loved his wife,
Struggled with kids,
To brighten future whole.

The seed has grown,
And the crypter,
Has grown 70 years old.
Respecting, “14 years” love,
He sat crying,
Happy of his decision,
Bound by world;
Waiting for new world,
Were fences didn’t exist,
And, people didn’t THINK,
He closed his eyes,
In front of “14 years” snap,
Took his last breath,
And said,“Love never dies, but ends.”

ashes of the burning flower

Ashes of the burning flower, playing with thorns,
Smoked my love away,
Colors fainted, and the rainbow sighed,
Leaves wilted and petals cried,
But the odor carried, the same essence again,
Nursing the buds,
The dew did not made the fire, burn the hopes away,
Hoping the rain to fall some day,
Fragrances united, with soil, like soul and memories remained,
Cried and cried the pot,
Remembering the days, when it held the pride, with flower,
Brightening the days, when every looked,
But all the way, the potter, the gardener, stood poker-faced,

Not letting a sign of pain,
Not even a line ache, passing the forehead, straight, FLAT!
How can I let this happen to me?
Am I strong? To even mutilate the pain, of burning, own?
Treacherous came, crossed the way,
Open eyed I saw all the game, defeating myself, with my rules,

Autumn splendors and fruits are bright,
But still the destiny, remains the same,
Wilted! Black! & Death!
Burn my stact, my soul, to ashes, to pain,
But let a dew cover,
Nurse my buds, & carry the fragrance, to the world again.
Show me light,
A smiling face, blushing flowers and rising sun,
I want to remove,
The curtains, the wall and look behind the smoke,
Out of the water,
The bud ready to bloom, free of ashes, which are now serving,

It in a very own,
Protected by thorns, among the green leaves,
Hidden below the wilted world,
Still unknown, to final fate, which waits,
With the potter, with gardener,
Holding a matchbox, high to their face, ready & sure,
To fire the world again!


I wrote this poem during October 03, without any reason, I do not know how, probably memories can never be out of my thoughts which beckon these words, come again and again.

broken heart

>>i never knew my heart also beats before it broke

I never knew I had a heart, till it broke. I lived with many and never found the kind I was looking for and when I found I failed, really lucky are those who are with none but succeed when they find the real one, but the failures taught me a great deal about myself and life. I got to stick with my principles more firmly and strongly. And, I am happy seeing most of those who succeeded, that I am with none. Thanks to God for providing me this opportunity and keeping me away from all such stupid things of life.

about life

>>I walked and walked and never found an end

Though I have not seen much life and I know my experiences are like a tiny drop in front of the ocean all learned people have, but still I have learnt few things about life, which I bet are true.
Most important of all that I have learnt is, whatever you do, whoever you are, whatsoever happens, one can never have control over, even own life, forget about others. Secondly, I have seen that things about which we keep running are not actually what we should be running behind, they are just the indicators towards the reality which we, most of the time forget. Lastly, I have known that if you can feel no weight in both happiness & sadness then you are the luckiest person in the world.

anger & frustration

"i smile after winning wars, but winning these make me frown" - vicky

Anger's the worst enemy of mine which every now and then forces me towards impulsive actions, which sometimes prove fatal for others and most of the time for me. This word, generally tries to dominate me when someone attacks my ego or my principles, my values.
Frustration's something, I come to know about, whenever it tries to attack me, and mostly gets defeated. In maximum of the cases, it attacks me when my actions and values are contradicting each other and both are justified, anyways values win.
The thing that both of them share is, both are too powerful and I have to work my best to get over them, before they get over my nerves. And, even after victory they leave me tired, but at the same time leave me much more immune towards them.

love & friendship

"love of two days has the power to end friendship of twenty years" - vicky

Love & Friendship, both are great words and both have the power to cause great pains, pains which may even be sweeter than happiness sometimes & at the same time they hold the power to lift one to the highest state of happiness. The only difference between LOVE & FRIENDSHIP is failure in path of friendship gives the chance of self-improvement and failure in path of love tends towards degeneration of own self in most time, though may also teach a new lesson of life. The great thing is success in any of the paths leads to utmost pleasure, happiness, delight and all the similar nouns. But, remember whatever be the case whatever worldly is in front is temporary and the true path lives in something else. Anyway this is my personal view and I may be totally wrong, but please no suggestions and no comments.

In the end I'll like to add. "It's not necessary that the person whom you love, love's you or is with you but if you love that person, even the imaginations will be more than enough and such love is much, much more stronger and true."